Sometimes life is just so unpredictable. You’re rolling along thinking life is just where it’s supposed to be. You make the decision that this is good, this is enough. Eyes wide open and looking forward to the next chapter. All the plans that are made, all the hard work that is done, always having that master plan in the back of your mind. A plan that powers you through the long hours. The lack of compensation emotionally and financially. You provide so much looking ahead believing that the best is yet to come. Then the lights are switched off, there you are sitting in the darkness of once was. The loss that was beyond your control. The hardest changes in life are those that happen outside of your control. When the metaphorical rug is yanked from beneath your rooted feet. The loyalty that was given unconditionally is hard to swallow. Was time wasted, was precious time taken away from your family worth the changes that now sit before you?
Lying before you a cluttered closet full of what was. Do you hold on or release? In those heartbreaking moments, relationships are challenged, loyalties are questioned. Trust is a thing of the past. What do you do? Take the high road and embrace what was? Watch sad movies, and cry every possible emotion out while indulging in the most sinful ice cream concoction? What if with that loss of once was contained the confusion of human emotion, a connection really puts a cloud of confusion forever lingering above your head and looming in your heart. Come on I can hear you saying you have to move on, you have to let it go. You all are a bunch of liars. We all have been there. You sit in that closet. You look at all the favorites staring you in the face. As your heart lights up it slowly begins to break in the thoughts of what no longer exists. The relationships, that no matter how much you believe will be the same, forever in your heart you truly know that trust and loyalty will never shine as bright as it once did.
So do you throw things out? Do you hold on to things that maybe someday you will want to come back to? Do you just tear everything out and start again? The metaphorical closet can become cluttered, scattered and just a hell of a disaster. Take your time to decide what you want to do. Ask all the opinions that you feel will bring clarity. In the end that closet is always going to be there. Opening the door of once was when you are reminded of it everyday can be saddening. Like all things in life we move on and open that door. Until that time don’t punish yourself for being human. Don’t allow anyone else to make your human feelings seem dark or wrong. Realize it’s ok to hurt and to be angry. Always remembering that someday that closet door will be so easy to open. Maybe there will be some things you just couldn’t let go. Or maybe you believe that once something doesn’t suit you or your needs that it’s time to release it. Releasing comes in your time not in anyone else’s. Keep that metaphorical closet as long as you want. You are someone that deserves all that you strive to be. I’m going to walk into my closet someday and clear it out. Remember that closet was empty at one time in your life. Which means in time, with acceptance of what once was. My closet will be brighter, more me, more my style.